Friday, January 13, 2012

Being a Mum!

Before I had Ollie, I don't think I knew how hard being a mum would be.  I didn't give thought to the sleepless nights, the tantrums, figuring out discipline etc.... but I also didn't give thought to how AMAZING it would be either.  I knew I would love being a mum.... but just how much, I had no idea.

To begin with, I didn't have much confidence and worried about everything I did, and was I doing it right.  I think I mentally beat myself up and constantly questioned whether I was being the best I could be for my little guy.  Over the last 3 1/2 years I have learned that as a mummy, I don't have to be perfect.  I don't think ANYONE can be a perfect mum.... we all have days where we question our parenting abilities and days where we think were frickin awesome!!!  

I feel it has really taken me to this point to bloom as a mum to Ollie.  Now that he is 3, I think I have got to grips with everything and feel confidence.  We have always had a lovely bond.  At times he drives me BONKERS but at other times (more so), my heart melts and my face aches from grinning.  His little face makes me SO happy.  I still to this day look at Ollie and can't believe I carried him around for 9 months and gave birth to him... and now have raised him for almost 4 years.  

Sometimes I wonder what James and I ever did with our evenings etc before we had Ollie (and this baby on the way)... We are rarely bored and I wonder how we ever filled our time!  We are most definitely kept on our toes.

I heart my family of 3 (and bump) and can't wait to heart my family of 4.

Is it easier the second time?  Knowing how things go and how to do everything you had to learn first time around?  I'm sure I'll be more relaxed in the early days than I was when I had Ollie.  I hope so anyway!

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