...because today is the day that my little lost bean should have been due.
It has been 7 months since we lost our baby and it still stings sometimes. Most days I am fine, but sometimes remembering, or fixing on what date it is, catches me off guard. I have friends who were due around the same time as I was, and it is so hard seeing them experience everything that I should be experiencing too.
I miss the little baby, I should in the next few days, have been holding in my arms and introducing to Ollie as his new sibling.
I constantly ask myself why it happened to me, but I will never know.
I suppose I will always wonder about what should have been, but I know today will be my biggest milestone and once today is over... I can maybe start to feel a little bit better.